Do I End Up Happy?

Hey friend,

This is going to be a pretty vulnerable post this week. It’s not a secret that this year has been a rough one. 2020 has not been for the faint of heart. I think some of us our coasting through it rolling with the punches, then the rest of us are taking the punches — hard.

I saw a post from 2010 pop up on my memories on Facebook a few days ago that said, “Do I end up happy?” Now, I know that’s lyrics from a song, but I also know as a teenager, I wasn’t happy. So although they were lyrics, I genuinely was wondering if I would end up happy. I know as a teenager and even into my twenties that I wasn’t following Jesus. Now, I did believe in him but I didn’t do anything else to pursue that.

Despite going to a private Christian college, it took me many years after that to even really find Jesus. Even when I found Jesus there was a lot of straying away in between all of that. It took my own pastor looking at me and saying, “you are broken” (said out of love not insult) to really understand that I was truly broken. I wasn’t happy on the inside because I wasn’t living for Jesus. I had a lot of self-hatred and held unforgiveness within. I was trying to find happiness in this world, which was a never ending chase. But let me tell you this, when you bring all of that to the feet of Jesus and allow him to cover it in his blood, you will experience change. Maybe not overnight, but with time and consistency, your life will change. You’ll seek him instead of this world.

You see, Jesus is where I find peace and joy. I find true refuge in him, not the things of the world. I say this a lot, but there is nothing sustainable about this world. The world will never provide you with a firm foundation like Jesus will. In the valleys and in the mountains, he is still there with open arms.

I mean if you really think about it, are you able to be satisfied in the places where God is not? Those negative thoughts and words you have about yourself; is not from God. Those people gossiping about you, or better yet, you gossiping about others; is not from God.

If you have to doubt if it’s from God or not, it’s not from him, I can promise you that. His voice is loud, it’s obvious, it’s loving but also fathering. It is convicting, but also caring. He is not set out to tear you down, but tear the lies down you’re hearing and living in.

So even though this year has been a tough one for some of us. Despite the hurt, trials, and testing; know that you can find true joy through him. His love is selfless, he isn’t afraid to reach out his hand to bring in his lost sheep.

And to answer the question, “Do I end up happy?” Yes, you do. As long as you choose to live life in relationship with Jesus and forget about how this world tells you to live. Being in relationship with him is sustainable joy. I can vouch for that.

Have a great week,
Brittany ❤️